I urge, then, first of all, that requests, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for everyone … (1 Timothy 2:1 NIV)

Intercession.  What is it?  I don’t feel that I can adequately define it. But something clicked in me today.  I used to be a man of intercession.  Not saying I did it all right.  In fact, I’m quite sure I did it all wrong but God in His mercy used what I could give at the time. I used to pray for hours a day — for myself, for my family, my friends… I had a huge notebook that I kept track of everything.  Eventually I switched to a digital list on my PDA/phone.  I saw God answer many prayers for my friends and family but not for myself.  It seemed like He was turning a deaf ear to everything I needed help with.  I became angry… calloused on the inside. God, why do you answer my prayers for all these people and you never answer the things I need? Silence. I eventually got so fed up that I just quit praying.  I was jealous of all the people I was praying for because God answered my prayers for them so quickly.  I felt like the unwanted step-child.  It’s a terrible thing to admit, eh?  I was this way for several years.  Sure, I still prayed sometimes, but I lost the spirit of prayer.  Is there such a thing as prayer burn-out?  I think I developed a chronic case of it.

The earnest (heartfelt, continued) prayer of a righteous man makes tremendous power available [dynamic in its working] (James 5:16 Amplified)

Years later, I was praying with a dear friend of mine.  All of a sudden he was overcome with the Spirit and started praying in tongues.  It was a new experience for him.  He was speaking in Hebrew.  I know what the language sounds like, but I don’t know it, so I don’t know what he said.  But his voice changed.  It was the voice of Jesus.  I’d heard that voice before.  He collapsed backwards.  All of the anger, bitterness, and frustration I had toward God was gone.  Jesus lifted it off me in that moment.  I still didn’t understand all these things past, but it didn’t matter anymore.  I didn’t have to understand.

The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much. (James 5:16 KJV)

After that experience with God, I have spent the last few years trying to recuperate.  I enjoy prayer again.  But at times I find it frustrating.  In the last year I have experienced His presence and He has taken me places that I would have never dreamed were possible.  But still, I am weak.  I feel worn out.  My spirit feels tired from this war raging within and without.  The spirit of distraction is strong everywhere I go.

Something within me needs to change, has changed, and is changing.

Be still, and know that I am God. (Psalm 46:10 NIV)

Be still.

Let it sink down.
Relax.
Fall into it.
Abandon.
Let go.
Be quiet.

Eu esperarei por Ti.
Stir up the flame, O God.

and oh… how He loves us so… oh how he loves us…

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